how can u be prego again
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
