I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
