That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
