he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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