fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
