i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
