return my video game
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Randomize
