just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Randomize
