Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
