After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
