Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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