did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
