is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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