worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
