OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
