Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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