I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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