Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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