If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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