I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
