So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
