I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
They are going to name an STD after you.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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