I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
