butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
We named our party play list daddy issues
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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