he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
