i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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