so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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