Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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