it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
