i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
