epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
