She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
