good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
That accounts for only three of the penises
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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