I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
