Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
