we're blogging at a bar
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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