He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
