I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize