so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
