Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
