Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
