they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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