Can Purell be used as lube?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize