there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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