How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
