hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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