i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
