His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
