he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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