Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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