i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Still dying that you shit outside
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I am naked and annoyed.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
