He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize
